Step By Step

What a difference a day makes. Acupuncture treatment yesterday combined with a shorter than usual walk resulted in a no-panting night for Nicholai and hence a restful night for a vigilant dog mom. I never cease to be amazed at the profound effect simple, inexpensive interventions can make. No sooner stated than I hear the voice of doom reminding me that one day, it will all be over and that these amazing treatments will no longer work. Right, I argue back to myself, but even if I were spending thousands of dollars on more invasive treatment, at the end, the result would be the same – a trip over the rainbow bridge. And what of all this sweet time in between? Did the vet and I not discuss just yesterday the loss of a dog for whom chemotherapy failed miserably, rendering far less happy earthly time for the dog with his humans? Damn.

I still lament the fact there's no cure for Nicholai's lymphoma. On an individual level, I work each day for peace and a Zen-like acceptance of what is. In the bigger picture, I embrace my fury at the systems that pollute every aspect of our environment on the one hand and offer us inane solutions – the loss of body parts, carcinogenic radiation, and toxic drug therapy – on the other hand.

I've begun a methodical shift in my own life toward the cleanest, simplest life I can manage. Local real food is my number one campaign. Shifting from a recycle mindset to a "reduce and reuse" mindset is number two. I plan to go through the house eliminating plastic – can you imagine? Two drawers full of Tupperware – bye, bye. I realized the other day I don't even know how to organize my veggies in the fridge without plastic bags; so here I am, growing a host of fresh food right in my own back yard and then sticking it in plastic bags. Help! Then there's lotions and soaps and creams, oh my. Bought a sweet smelling all-organic lavender body lotion, then looked at the plastic squeeze bottle; this is gonna be difficult.

The not difficult exciting part; I met a woman wild crafting local herbs for tonics and medicines and got some dandelion tincture – yeah! Got a friend experimenting with olive-oil, shea butter, calendula and lavender for body lotion, nice. I'm enjoying the look and feel of "Ball" jars for milk, yogurt, tea, juice and purchased a few nice glass containers with re-useable lids for storing left-overs. I know there're things I haven't even thought of – sunscreen for example (Okay, obviously I have thought of it, or I wouldn't mention it). Methodical process, step by step, remembering to be patient with myself and others.

Nicholai helps provide me both a righteous anger to fuel change, and a temperate peace to live each day with some amount of joy – even amidst the chaos.